JORGE'S OFFICIAL WIZARD BLOG
Jorge Velasquez used to throw all of his garbage into a dark hole in his bathroom that he believed had no bottom. Recently, however, he discovered a certain aroma coming from a specific corner of his attic. It turns out, this 'hole' is actually a rogue portal that has decided its exit would be several floors directly above its original location. After sticking his head into this portal, he found that it leads to a completely cold and black abyss with ash-colored walls barely visible in the far distance. The exit hole is only visible as a small speck of light from what looks to be several miles down from the entrance. It seems that this hole is a part of the house area he was trapped in last week which seemed to expand for hundreds of rooms. Honestly, he is not even going to question it.
Hortus is a gnome that has been living with Jorge Velasquez for nearly a year now, so far he has never experienced the things Jorge has, as he is the only one with an internet connection. Recently, however, Jorge has heard noises during the night that sound like the clicking of a keyboard. Upon further inspection of the orb's search history, it seems that Hortus has been watching nothing but "Skibidi Toilet" and "Poppy Playtime." Both of these look quite sinister, and if he begins to learn anything from these images Jorge may have to install parental controls.
Jorge Velasquez is campaigning for the position of Chairman of Gnome Affairs due to his extensive knowledge and appreciation of the Gnome species. They need guidance as to whose ankles to attack, and when it is allowed. Hopefully his campaign catches on, Jorge is quite confident in his skill.
Today, whilst searching through his belongings, Jorge found a rather strange treasure chest filled to the brim with copies of a film named "Eight Crazy Nights" made by a man by the name of Adam Sandler.
This film is diabolical. Never in his life has Jorge seen a performance this outrageous, with the especially annoying character "Whitey Duvall" absolutely ruining Jorge's beautiful evening.
Would not recommend.
As many of you may know, Jorge Velasquez has a considerable amount of goblins in a specialized room designed to contain each of the goblins' energy and condense it into usable electricity via exercise wheel. Today however, these wheels ran out of lubricant to continue being spun. In response, it was necessary that Jorge entered the chamber to do his duties as a goblin caretaker. These particular goblins are quite angry and vicious, which, normally, is perfect for powering a large tower. Due to the goblins' strong emotions, Jorge needed to wear a rather thick suit of armour that he found donned by a cadaver 3 kilometers from his wizard tower. The task, thankfully, was simple enough for Jorge to enter and get out with little effort. Although the armour is scratched and rather tattered from the relentless scratching of the goblins, it is now designated as the official anti-goblin suit for entering the electrical chamber for maintenance.